Sunday, September 23, 2007

sorry mom(retrospect concert and last week teaching)

well im sad to say it, but i just finished my last week of teaching, we had a great last day though, i kinda invented a thai version of sximon says that i like to call och bie(in thai it basically means go away!)
so what id do is id write a bunch of verbs on the board, like run jump, dance(a big favorite) laugh, scream, swim, ect.
then id teach them what all the words ment by acting them out and having them mimic me, after i knew that they understood what all the words ment weedplay a game where id point to the word abnd say it, and the last kid to do the action, id point at him or her and yell OCH BIE!!!
and then the kid would go sit down behind me, it was a great game, but i think that i probably shouldent have made them yell as much, they were loud, and definetly should of thought about the other teachers(yeah right! my kids are way cooler than thiers)
im sorry mom

one thing that im gonna miss the most, well besides the kids and tyhier smilin faces... the ice cream
yep...
theres an ice cream man who would come to the school every day with a huge tub of homemade cocunut ice cream! and evey day id buy 2 cups of it(the cups were small)
one day id already eaten lunch and was ready to go home, but the ice cream dude haddent come yet, so i thought to myself, ill just wait five more minuets(i could never spell that word right) 5 min later i get up look out my office window(oh yeah i had an office... actually mabye it was the english depatment... andi was on the couch, thats not the point though, back to my story) i look out my office window and hes not there, so i wait another five and another and then it hits me... im eighteen years old, 18! legaly a man in most countrys and im waitin for the ice cream man like a freaking third grader!
so i waited five more min, then i got me some ice cream and went home.
it was delicious.
in the future they said i can teach tere some more, but the thing is that, since we have all of october off from school(yeah! how you like that cody??!!)i probably should go do my last week there, hmm im my 7 weeks here i have not finished five consecutive days of school yet!
sorry mom
its not my fault really

well what else?
oh so on wednesday i didnt have to teach a class, so after school on teus. i took a very long bus ride to mahsarahkam with the other exchange students to go and see a thai hardcore/screamo concert(the bands name is retro spect) if you dont know what scramo is ask my dad, he loves the stuff!
Oh one thing i havent told you bout thailand is that americans are treated like celebreties(kinda sad really), let me put it this way, one of the girl that was with us got in for free, just cause she was white, so basically we got to get right up to the front about 2 feet from the band!, they were awesome, i crowd surfed one of my friend, i frankly wiegh a bit too much for the dudes, and jumed into the mosh pit i actually didnt get hurt at all, cause honestly, again, i out weigh every one in the place by about 30 lbs, i felt bad though, one time i got shoved from behind, so i turned round an shoved the dude back without taking a look at him, when i finally realized who it was, i was lookin at this thai kid, my age and all, but he couldent of weighed more than 120, and he was on his back starting to get up about five feet away....so i did what any one would do,
i booked it to the other side of the stage, before he could get up and use some mui thai on my coward butt, after the concert was over, oh yeah! i caught(now when i say caught, i definetly mean ifought kicked and bit like a crazy man through hordes of thais) a drum stick, i was very proud of that!
sorry mom

after the concret was over though, we were walkin outside trying to call my friends host dad and lookin for the bands van, when it started to rain, andi dont mean roseville-stlye rain, i mean thailand-jumanji-monsoon-style-torential-downpour-action!
so here we are 6 forieners, trying desperatly to get to some shelter before we drown, i actually somehow got water up my nose while running!
finnaly w found shelter, only it was already occupied by about 20 thais, so we squeezed in and they oogled us while we tried to get a signal on a soaked cell phone, through the miracle of technology it finally worked and when the dad came to pick us up the ^ of us piles into his four seater wagon, and went to pick up the two girls that didnt want to stick around for the concert, they were at some 7-11!
we got them, yes that means theres eight of us in this tiny car while the rain still falls in buckets, wait not buckets BATHTUBS!!!
we finnally get to the main road to go home only to find that its not a road any more, its a THIGH HIGH RUSHING RIVER!!!!!!
the dad tells us we cant drive through so hell find another way home while we leave our shoes and other valuables in the car and ford the river!
(do any of you guys remember the game Oregon Trail that game rocked!)
so we get out of the car snd start to fight our way across, remember the first original star wars movie where Han and Luke are traped in the compact with that sanke
eyeball beastie? Thats what it felt like! trash was floatin every where(it WAS a city street) and every bransh or bottle that hit my leg under the surface, felt like some massive thai snake comin to grab me and drown me in th murky depths, and i didnt even have a blaster or light saber to kill it with!
eventually we triumphed over the river and made our way home, nothin to intersting about 8 farang stumbling barefoot in the rain for about 1 1/2 km
sorry mom
were fine i promise

any ways that was my week tomorrow i stard school again, as a student this time,LAME!!!!!!
sorry mom
i know its why im here and all, i can stll voice and opinion right?
jeezz!
well until next week,
ryan



ps
if you guys havent noticed i usually up date on sunday nights- thats sunday mornings for you!

pps
i love you mom!

Monday, September 17, 2007

hey everybody
OK SO I JUST FINISHED my first week as an english teacher, and its SO fun!,
i tech kids that are about 12-12 years old english, i actually like it more than going to school.

so monday i went to the elementry school and found another english teacher and told her who i was, great she said, class is just about to start, she led me to a class with like 40 kids(yep 40!) in it, intro duced me as pei ryan(pei in thai means big brother, cool huh?) and then started to leave the class!!
i called out right before she left the class, and i asked her what i should do, she looked at me this look like"are ypu kiddin me"
she replied teach them, i go alllllrrigght.....
what should i teach them?
anything.
anything?
yes.
whatever i want?
yes.
Sweet!
what?
um.. nothing..
so here i am looking at40 or so kids waiting for the farang(is thai slang for foriener) to start to talk, so i start out by intro ducing myself
i go MY NAME IS RYAN,
they respond MY NAME IS RYAN... i laugh and say no,no,no
they go "no no no"
so i wrote it on the board and pounded my chest wgen i said it and they got the idea, so i started asking thier names, with a bit of difficulty and the same problems that i had before, they got what i was asking,n but when they answered me, it was in a voice barely above a whisper, and for some reason they wouldnt talk any louder, and then i realized why, in thailand children, especially in schools are taught not to experss themselves, and kind of to be seen, not heard, and looking around at othe other teachers, i realized, well,
there jerks!
imean with some exceptions the treaches will hit the kids or push them around to get them in line, and basically teach them that everyone is the same, and if you diffrent, thats bad.
then i realized, they thought id be like that too,
so i immeadiatly jumed up onto my desk(which brought tons of laughter) and yelled out MY NAME IS RYAN!
WHATS YOURS?!
and pointed at a boy in the front, laughing he stood up and whisperd robert(i actally forget all the kids names cause there like atleas six syllables long, so im gonna make up an english name for him)
i put my hand to my ear(im still standin ontop of the teachers desk mind you!)and said ah-rai(thai for what?)
he said again robert
AH-rai!?
robert alittle louder
AH-rai!?
robert!
what!??!!!
ROBERT!!!!!(this time just about as loud as me, at the top of his lungs)
i jump of my desk and say really fast "well robert its my pleasure to meat you i hope your doing well" andshake his hand
this makes all the kids burst out laughing along with robert, when they finally calm down i strat to teach them more things like letters #'s shapes colors and shapes, all using the same method of running around the class, getting in shouting matches with them, walking on the desks,and basically mking aa fool of myself and getting wierd looks from people walking aroud and seeing in the classroom
and well, they loved every minute of it, the students after thier intitial shyness left, were on thier feet ashouting back colors and shapes and whatnot, after that class i went to teach two more that day, (using my own patented teaching style every time, with tons of success, everywhere) then i took off aft6er lunch, cause no more classes were assigned to me, that was cool, because when i was GOING to school i didnt get out till like 4 or so,now im done BY 2 which leave me plenty of time to ride my bike( i did 18 km. the opther day and was proud of myself even though a km is less tan a mile haha)
the next day, i had a new batch of classes to break out of thier shells, so i did the same less on, but this time, we also covere animals and the sounds they make(id do my best to draw it on the board, then id ask what it was, then id point to my throat, and then the calss would get up and moo, bark, or crow as loud as we could together
my third day teaching when i rode into school in my bike all the kids stopped and actually gave me an applause!
basicllay school goes like that, oh one time iwas writing the word school on the board and spealled it shool, a girl in the front row jumed up and exclaimed "pei lyan(they cant say r's to well)No Sooool! she grabbed the pen from me and proceeded to erase my mistake and write school "is Skkkkooool! she cried triumphantly, look at that corrected in spelling by a twelve year old thai girl, as you can see my speling hasnt emproved much..
well im starting to get carpal tunnel so ill leave you with one more funny strory that didnt happen that school
on saturday all the exchange students got togethr to hang out in khonkaen,we all decided on getting foot massages, and when i say WE i men them and by THEM i mean THE GIRLS(im the only guy exchange stugent in like a 60 km radius) so what the heck, ive never had it done befor what could go wrong right?
now for those of you that dont know me too well, i have got to be the most ticklish person i know, but that thought didnt cross my mind untill i sat down and the guy grabbed my foot, i brust out laughing, good thing it was just the exchange students there or i mught of gotten kicked out!
basically for a good deal of the HOUR! i had teary eyes, and in that silent laughter state, you the point where you almost piss yourself.
i felt really bad for the guy to, he couldent understand me when i tried to explain im ticklish, and he kept giving lookes to the other massustss(im sorry mrs bilderback)like great i ve got another 45 min. with this stupid frang!
i can understand him though, i almost kicked him in the head twice...

until next time
pei ryan

Sunday, September 9, 2007

Im mistaken for a local..................... until i open my mouth!

soooo.......
um this is my latest week in the exciting life ofn ryan!
hmmm
oh yeah, so school is going alright, except my classes are being taught in thai, so ive been reading alot( its wierd, in thailand, respecting the teachers, like we nowe respect is totally non existant!, let me explain, here you, wheter it be a concert,, class, or seminar, you have absolutly no obligation to sit still and listen, its perfectly normal in a class room setting to whip out an ipod, or read a book, or even carry on a full conversation with someone across the entire room! trippy huh? it took me about a week to get used to it, but now its not really so bad,)right now im working my way through pride and prejudice( all the exchange students have basically read all of the books we brought, so we have a little"book exchnge" goin on, oh all the exchane students in my city are girls, hence the femine book) and i have to admit, i like it alot, i relly hope mr darcy will stop being such a jerk
haha!!
ive gotten used to the food from the cantina, i usually order the same thing, rice, omelete, fried pork and little sweet peices of processes meat in a bowl, it decent, but my favorite foods, are pd thai, padsuyi, thai omletes, and this spicy pork and bamboo thing with a really long name.
hmm. oh so the school was closedfriday, cause all the teachers went to bkk(this is how we locals write bangkok)so all i had to do was push till thursday, but thursday morning the spicy soup i ate the night before, well it came back in a way that made me regret eatin g it, so my host mom told me to go back to bed, and just go to school late(oh yeah being late is also acceptable here)
school usually starts at 8:15
i got there at noon, but when i got there, i was just past the gate when this thai dude stopped me, and started talking really fast and pointing at my hair(oh yeah i got i cut agin to a fauxhawk)and i was like uh-oh hes gonna want me to cut it, so i htought fast, and decided nto use the language barrier to my advantage!
i started saying, "i dont speak thai" and " I cant understand you" even though he was blatanly madikin scisor motions with his fingers, when he stared doing that, i decided i had better book it befor someone who knew english came along, so i was like " hey man id like to talk, but im late for class so i gotta run" then i... well... kinda ditched him............sorry mom and dad
oh well i wont have to worry about the repurcusions from that incedent for another 2 weeks atleast, why you ask, well let me tell you the full story, later on thurs, some of my friends told me the have to go to military camp for the next 2 weeks, which means im stuck in a room full of girs that are so shy they won even talk to me, so what did i do?
i whined to my host mom of course!
she agreed that school would sucvk with no friends there, and she said shed think about something else i could do, cool huh? so later that night(oh forgot to mention that there is an elementry school across from my house)we went to the director of the elementy schools house, to see if i could................ wait..............this is amazing...... TEACH ENGLISH!!!!!!!!!!
so next to weeks im now known as Mr. alias and im an english teacher at a thai elementry school!
crazy huh?
hmmm.........
well thats all ive got for now, how hard could teachin english be, i mean heck! I SPEAK english

until next time
Mr.alias

Sunday, September 2, 2007

IMSO SORRY i for got to say cameron bal! in my thank you....and also if any of you have facebook, ive added pics from thailand!!!!!!!!!!!

Jack johnson on a bike in the jungle and other random memoirs...

memoirs, hmmm, i dont even know if i used that worn correctly oh well basically this is going to be a compilation of what ive been doing, and how ive been the last week, so without any more guilding the lily and ceratinly no further ado.............


so up with people(if you dont know who they are, basically they travel around the world for six months doin comunity service projects and doing singing and dancing benifit shows everywhere, really cool stuff..) came to nam phong(the little villige/town where i live)this week, and it was so great to speak to other people that can speak english!!
so i hung out with them and was able to skip school thurs, and fri to basically hang out at rehersals and sell coke and fanta outside the show to raise money for my rotay club
in short though, ive got to become friends with most of the cast, andgot to see thier amazing show in the front row,and im going to go plant trees with them and some monks topmmorow!

so ive been also chillin with other exchange students, yesterday we went to eat lunch and tour the malls and met some people from the peace corps(in khon kaen, forieners automatically have some kind of a bond forged between them, so its normal to just sktrike up a conversation)today though, i went bowling with candadians and americans, and shot pool with a german!

so ive realized my favorite thing to do here, it cant be done every day, or else it will loaswe its specialitlyness(i just made up a word)and and the weather must be perfect!
so this is what i do, if it rains during school, the heat of the day is gone when i get out, so it will be nice and cool, ill get on my bike,switch it to my lowest gear, so i pedal nice and slow, turm my ipod to a very relaxing jack johnson mix, and take the VERY long way home, through the rice patties!
its sounds simple emough, but belive you me, it is one of the best parts of my day, it turns the 5 minute ride into a half hour unwind time.

sooo............well
oh yeah! well my host brother(atom) is starting to become like an actual brother now its pretty cool, one he looks like me!(people always mistake me for a local until i open my mouth!)we argue over wich cartoons we watch will be in english, or thai!
we race for shotgun in the car
he hoggs the hot water
we have our own language consisting of grunts yells and nother random noises
any way its going really well with the family so thats a good thing i guess!

other random things:
i find my self watching thai sitcoms and soap operas and making up my own diologe for the actors
i know how to use a thai taxi now(there called tuktuks and they have 3 wheels and drive at ridiculous speeds through rush hour
i ate grasshoppers with the other exchange students(they taste like fish, chicken and garlic!)

oh this is funny,
so my host dad travels during the week and comes home on the weekends, and every saturady morning, when i come downstairs hell be eating breakfast and reading, heel see me look up and ask "do you know thai yet?" ill say umm no, and then hell go "oh" and go back to his meal, so this yesterday when the did that to me i responded to his question" well do you know english yet?" he goes "uhhh" so i sit down and eat my noodles ha!

sorry this post is so random, im really tierd right now and this is the best i can do in this state, i hope you were entertained but my razorsharp wit and charm
um i guess
this
is
good
bye

ryan


ps today officially makes one month in thailand yeha!!!!!!!!





pps i just recived a stack of letters in the mail from friends so, bryan yeo, anne lenters,jamie bartlet,mrs. constance, michelle broddos, cathy haywrd, matt locket, and noahs mother,THANKYOU SOOO much they really made my day!